My Funny Friends

Last Thursday was my last day of preschool with our kiddos. It was bittersweet to say goodbye to these precious children and their wonderful families. I was blessed to have them in my life over the school year, but I knew going into the job that this was going to be a transition year. It would eventually come to an end.

It was such a joy to be one of their first teachers and spend the year watching them grow and learn in significant ways. You can almost watch the neurons firing across the synapses in their brains building all sorts of new connections as they learn and experience the world in fresh ways! All throughout the year they're experimenting with various ways of moving through space, solving problems, negotiating social interactions, and constructing their worldview.

Because preschoolers are still so new to this world (Three short years ago they were helpless infants, and now they're in school! Amazing.), their ideas and perceptions about life and how things work often prove to be hilariously charming. The following is a collection of quotes I gathered from our darling students over the course of the school year.

(All About Family)

Girl: "Who is your mommy?"

Boy: "Mama."

Me: Who has a dog at home?
Girl: I do! It has pink and white fur. Its name is Pig.

Me: There are lots of names for daddies. We can call them daddy, or dad, or papa, or father.

Preschooler: Or Ross. My daddy is called Ross because he draws ("dross") things.

Girl: "My daddy is a doctor."

Me: "Oh, really? I didn't know that. What kind of doctor is he?"

Girl: (blank stare)

Me: Is he... a surgeon or a baby doctor?"

Girl: "No!...(looking at me like I'm crazy) He's a grown-up doctor! He can't be a baby!"

________________________

This silly photo of me hung in the snack room all year.
You can't tell here, but the original photo is torn
and covered in grubby, little fingerprints. I love it.

(Treats from Snack Time)

At preschool I learned that "some hot dogs are made from cotton because they kind of taste like cotton. You should really try them sometime!"

Preschooler sits down at the snack table, pours himself some apple juice, and says: I need some coffee...!

Me: Coffee? Why?

Boy: I'm tired. I need a nap. My baby brother kept me awake all night.

Me. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Why did he keep you awake?

Boy: I guess he just doesn't know the rules.

"Dear God, thank you for our mommies and daddies and fast shoes. Amen."

Me: "What do babies eat?"

Preschoolers: "Legos!"

"Small pieces!"

"Straw and blueberries!"

"God, thank you for snack. And thank you for super heroes. And thank you for the real heroes in this world. Amen."

Me: "Okay, everyone, make sure you're working on eating your snack. Fill up your tummies so you can have lots of energy for all our fun things today!"

Preschooler: "Yeah. I have been growing, like, all day."

Boy: Oh, I love this stuff. It's called Pirates' Booty.

Girl: Hey, don't say that word. That's not nice. Miss Smellie, he said a bad word!

Me: Well, this is a little different. He was just talking about the name of the snack. But you're right. Some families don't say "booty." Do you say "bottom" in your family?

Girl: No...

Me; What do you say?

Girl. We say, "Sorry."

_______________________

(Spiritual Lessons)

Me: I'm glad you're feeling better today. We missed you at preschool!

Boy: Yeah. I only have one more puking life. And then in my next life I won't puke anymore.

Me: That's right! When we believe in Jesus, someday we will get to have a new life with him forever. And in that life there will be no more tummy aches or head aches or tears. Isn't that wonderful?!

Boy:...But what about lunch? How will we eat lunch?

Teacher: "Some people didn't think Jesus was the King, and they wanted to get rid of him. That's not very nice, is it?"

Girl: "...Spank them!"

(after having our eyes closed for prayer) "Miss Smellie, I like the top of your eyes."

Me: "God is everywhere, isn't he? He's in our homes, and here at school, and everywhere we go, even though we can't see him, He is with us. "

Girl: "But when is Jesus going to come out of my heart?"

Me: "Well, some day Jesus is going to come back to earth and live with us. And then we'll get to see him and hug him!"

Girl: "Yeah. And right now Jesus is working in the clouds."

_______________________

(Minds at Work)

Dramatic play phone conversation between two preschoolers:

"Hello. I want to order some tuptakes." (cupcakes)

"We don't have tacos."

"Okay. Love you! Bye!"

Me: What is your teddy bear's name?

Boy 1: He doesn't have one.

Boy 2: You could name him Bearby!

Boy 1: Nah... I'm gonna name him... People!

Boy 2: Or you could name him after me, so you can think about me all the time.

Me: "Let's all sing the ABCs while we wait."

(we sing it)

Me: "Okay, now how about Twinkle Twinkle Little Star?"

(we sing it)

Preschooler: "Okay, now I'm gonna sing Star Wars. Dooo do do do do doooo do...do do do doooo do..."

Teacher: "Everyone close your eyes tight! Can you see anything?...No! Now what do we call it when someone can't see?"

Preschooler: "Dead..."

Boy: (chatting with his friend during calendar time)

Me: "It's time to listen right now."

Boy: "...I'm *talking!*" (looking and sounding incredulously offended)

Girl: "Meow, meow, meow."

Me: "I can hear that you're meowing. Are you pretending to be a kitty?"

Girl: "No, I'm a reindeer."

Girl: What's this?

Me: That's an x-ray. It shows a picture of the inside of your body.

Girl: The inside of your boobie?!

Me: No. Your BODY.

Little boy (wiping away a few tears): "I have some water in my eyes..."

Me: "Oh, let me see. How did that get there?"

Little boy: "Just from my bones..."

Preschooler: "Hey! I can see Africa from here!"

Me: "Really? What does it look like?"

Preschooler: "It looks like a red house!"

____________________

(One-Line Wonders)

Boy: "Guess what I brought for my sharing today... The Batmovehicle!"

(playing knights/princesses, castles, and dragons) "Hey, try to fire-breathe me!"

Girl: "Miss Smellie, when I grow up I want to be you."

Boy: (sees a college student walk by wearing large headphones) "Hey! Look at that wrestling guy!"

"What's the opposite of cold?"..."Nice."

"What's the opposite of happy?"... "Birthday party!"

"What's the opposite of winter?"... "Tuesday."

"What's the opposite of push?"... "Not push."